ME~

0 comment(s) / 14:36

haiz... this week is a super not nice week.
not only am i pissed, im disappointed in myself.

this week got four tests? ss amaths eng and phys.
sad to say i screwed ss amaths alot! hopefully i wont fail cos got remedial._.
eng was quite okay. hopefully i can pass?
phys miracle leh. was the only humanly paper? although phys is hard;D
ahahhhh shit! im so disappointed in myself.
i studied alot and put in alot of efforts, especially amaths.
but then oh well... just flunk CA. byebye to 6 and below 10 for L1R5 T.T
gonna study hard for nxt week tests--> chem chi bio! anymore?
jiayous jiayous to myself;D

let highlight some stuff during lessons;DD
first got interview on tues. with yuping and jairia;D
but then i think i only talked three sentences?
half or more is celina xie so luo suo de talk and talk and talk.
walaos leh damn luo suo. she talked about her stuff when she was young._.
i was thinking like walaos, 50 years must use how much time to say._.
until yuping nid to go off, if not i guess we had to stay until very late.
thanks to jiahuan and guihui for waiting for me for half hr;DD

and i nvr kena hist remedial~ hooray.
i thought i would kena cos my hist not that good and i failed before.
hahha remedial stress me leh;D
but then kena eng remedial, which is like damn no useT.T
but then i dun care, nxt week gonna say i didnt know;D
although i can pon cca awhile...

this week super super depressed T.T
am i thinking alot? i dun think so leh.
i THINK that i used to run away from problems cos i dunno how to solve them.
I BEEN RUNNING AWAY FRM REALITY EVER SINCE LAST YR HANDOVER T.T
but now, i dun want to run anymore. i gonna to face them!
so ppl dun think i think alot. is those i been thinking but i nvr say it out._.
blahblahblah...

i know nothing could solve them. they are not easy to solve, just like amaths and all those stupid questions that i encounted before.
especially me give up very easily.
so how? i know there are alot of ppl who helped me or comforted me.
thanks to all of them. but its still my responsibility. i hv the duty to help them understand and change for the future.
although sometimes i really wanna run away again._.
wat can i do? i cant change myself.
i know partly is cos of me. i been too nice for them to climb on top of my head.
haiz... i dunno wat im supposed to do laT.T

ytd cca was okay? pirates was damn nice;D
ruth came back. but she went to teach the sec1s...
my lungs hurts leh. cos all my loud speakers are gone.
guihui went to teach sec1. wanping sokchin went to do IC.
so no choices i had to blast. somemore i wasnt feeling abit well ytd. idk is gastric or wat;D
after cca was yea yea...
nah~ i dun think anything else le. dinner was cancelled cos nobody wanna go;D
did seating arrangement. it was such a hard puzzle to solveT.T

two more weeks to hols~ jiayous;D although hols very busyT.T but at least i can sleep;D
and jiayous to the future test;D
and jiayous to solve the problem;D

0 comment(s) / 20:27

damn pissed off ;X
first time so pissed off. really really not joking;D

first, pissed off that the juniors didnt know today got cca.
i mean like is it obvious?
i dun like it when the juniors are so dependent on the seniors.

second, okay la this one not so serious la. is only trigger.
attendence like shit. of cos i know some ppl got reasons that they cant come cca.
but then i been calling other ppl who nvr give me reasons why they were absent.
calling and calling and calling
you know how pissed i get when ALL of them switch off their handphone?

third, SO MANY PPL NVR BRING HARMOC.
BY THE TIME I GET DAMN PISSED OFF THAT I WANNA EXPLODE?
i mean like dun blame me for not messaging. IM NOT SUPPOSED TO SPOONFEED
but then wat can i do?
only 4 brought their harmoc. sectionals was pathetic.
jy also came in to hear us play. how embarrassing can i get?

why? why did the situation become like that?
i was hoping that the juniors would understand my situation.
why should i be angry about them? because i care about ergao.
but wat they do? they just make me a failure!
so dun they think they REALLY owe me an apology? like seriously!!

shit la i dunno wat i saying today.
just damn pissed off today.
hope that can continue all the way till friday.
okay this is just a shit post. u can dun nid care. just wanna explode!!

0 comment(s) / 14:02

main part of cny over le. hol also over leT.T
sad sad. now back to sch alr T.T

yay~ i shall just skip everything else and talk about my trip in malaysia and ytd dinner with HO and ergao;DD

sat went back malaysia;D
omg hahah traffic jam damn badly. 2 hrs past le still at singapore._.
lalala. malaysia fun fun^^
although we nvr put fire cracker this time, but then fire work all these damn nice;DD
not to mention meet all my cousins and everyone else and talk and do nothing;DD
hongbaos quite alot;D
gamble fun fun fun^^ hahahha i lost alot;X
lost $20 plus ringgit. but nvm is the fun that counts;D
hahahah not to mention all the stupid things that the children did, hahahah sure the adults qi si alr;DD
came back on mon night;D train sux;X
yay~ march hol going back again^^ although i think not enough time for me to do hwk and revise tests and watever shit la;D
anw, i dun wanna care about hwk before mye;D i wanna concentrate more on fun, play, and of cos cca;DD

and ytd dinner with HO at 18chefs;DD
book almost the whole 18chefs;D 2 whole rows;D
yay cos HO rawks;D ppl wanna come 18chefs eat but then no space;D
somemore i saw a whole grp of ppl also wanna go 18chefs, but then we still inside;D
obviously make alot of noise there. hopefully wont kena complain._.
took alot of photos, not to mention mostly is spam de;DD
photos and videos and stuff on facebook;D

guihui pwn ytd;DD hahahah most photo is her de;D
after that wanna go separate way, section go with section;D
ergao wanna go pet safari;D but then yigao kidnapped our nicole;DD
hahha after that went to find them, look alot of places;D
hahaha finally found yigao;D octave join later;D
took batch photo. hahah maybe only the sec4s;D
and of cos ergao photo;D although only 6 out of 17 ergao ppl were present;D
see la ppl. dun want go u will miss out alot of fun^^
hahahha went home quite early;X like 8;D the earliest time to go home.
ytd was super ultra very blahblah fun^^
is the first HO outing for dunno how many years le;D although only half de cca went;D
yay~ nxt time too okay;D although i think nxt time is during handoverT.T

nxt week super busy le. got 3 tests.
okay la compare with other ppl also not alot ma;D
but me going to work hard;D 6 as L1R5 for CA;DD
hopefully la;D
today going to relative hse bai nian.
tmr going to godma hse bai nian.
busy busyT.T but then can gamble again^^ ohshit gamble so much;D hahhaha
so byebye ppl till nxt time;DD

make up my mind to give up;D so me going to jiayous;D
and ergao prob? currently dun want to think about it;D spoil mood;D
i will try to save the prob;D so thankyou to anyone who attempted to help me;D
including jiahuan, huixian, junyang blahblah;DD
i promise i will do my best;D MUST HV CONFIDENT IN MYSELF;DD
i wont let anyone down;D thats my principle!

0 comment(s) / 20:50

HAPPY ADVANCE CHINESE NEW YEAR AND VALENTINES DAY;DD

flying off tmr. so doubt can post on the date;D
new year is finally here. other than food, hongbaos blahblah, i finally can sleep alr;DD
hooray to chinese new year~
although got valentines day too, but not my business la. hahahha
thank you;D im single in this valentines day.
nice valentines day, cos im seriously wanna give up;DD

i shall post when i come back frm malaysia on mon;D
if tues got time;D and whether i can rmb stuff that happened this week;D
but today is such a nice day;D
meihua was stupid! celebration was okay. going out with huixian and jiahuan was fun^^

okay ppl good luck in getting fat hongbaos;D
and have fun eating sweets and chocolate and watever~ dun get sore throat can liao;D hahah

0 comment(s) / 20:40

我不知道为什么事情会变成这样.
我已经放弃了. 真的内心话.
可是你一直出现, 一直打扰我的内心,我的心情...
为什么?为什么? 我不知道我为什么会变得如此.
明知道这样是没有结果的. 我却如此.
所以不要再扰乱我的情趣. 拜托了!

hates it when ppl are sad about in a situation worse than mine.
ohpls just compare. and stop being 小题大作.
bad day...

you, plus this, plus SL job damn tough.
i know i know, im being such a shibai SL.
i cant read pu immediately, my beats are always off, i dun get the respect from the juniors cos im just being treated like a pile of shit blah blah...
when i looked back to the expectation that ruth and amanda had for me, i knew i disappointed them. i made them choose the wrong choices. but sometime i do yuan that why ruth and amanda would choose me as the SL. i dun hv any quality to be one.
now? ergao standard really like some shit.
walaos leh. lousiest section leh. even lousy than bass? (sry to bass ppl for this)
i tried! i really tried! i tried to make ergao prac more and improve ourselves.
yet? nobody cares. nobody wanna care about me.
even though i changed to being strict during sectionals.
i feel bad. i changed alotT.T
not allowing them to play, not allowing them to eat...
although i know nobody cares about this. i dunno why. i really dunno why i didnt meet the expectation of the seniors. i didnt want to disappoint them. i wanted the role to prove myself that i hv the leadership skills. and apparently i dun hv.
really! i failed. I FAILED. i wanted to surrender at first. but i didnt. i dun want my favourite ergao to drop, get scolded or looked down.
how? how can i make the juniors listen to me? how can i make sectional worth it with fun and enjoyment too? i dun want ergao tradition to die. the tradition that ergao is the playful-est section. how can i get the juniors to prac seriously no matter in sectional or dazu.
now i know why. why amanda wanted handover fasterT.T it's not easy.
i know i shibai alr. but im trying to save the problem, just before handover.
i wanted the juniors to prac seriously when it is the time to, play and talk when it is the time, all before handover.
but i know i will nvr succeed... no one will help me, or rather its no useT.T

0 comment(s) / 15:26

short post. nid to go out soon;D hahahhah

mon sec1 orientation;DD
finally like a yr that we dun nid to plan;D hooray~
my grp--> pebbles damn quiet leh.
mostly sec1 sec2. all quiet de.
jieying our very nice leader;DD hahahha
but then no water gamesT.T like only some stupid bomb._.
omg omg damn disgusting flour;D my hair totally white;D FROSTY~
teachers treated us pizza;D but sad i cant eat.
in the end i guess the sec4s had to stuff everything since got alot leftover;D
this time de orientation games not bad eh.
but then i think they forgot sth--> SELF INTRO;DD
okay maybe other grp hv, but my grp dun hv._.
then i dunno all the sec1 names. LOL
last orientation in ahs and HO liao. so sadT.T

wed JOSEPHINEEEE BIRTHDAY;DD
hahahahha was chionging card before assemble. hahha totally messy
recess all chionging card;D hahahha me go do nothing;D
after school~ managed to trick jo to go HO room.
i rawks~ managed to stalk josephine;D although like very fake;D
hahahahah celebration was a success~ ;DD
the card damn nice lo. hahhhaha;D and she immediately use the wallet we gave;D
but then cos jo hv remedialT.T
could only celebrate awhile.
went home after that;D

thurs AMANDA CAME BACK~
hahahaha suddenly eng lesson got msg frm her. LOL
eng was total boring. so was sms-ing with her.
after sch went to look for her~ talk awhile.
she look weird in RJ uniform in ahs;D hahahha
talk awhile in guihui classroom.
then went home together;D random~ hahahah

fri~ cca? sec1 first sectional;D
finally got their harmoc. i thought jiaolian will forget to bring ;x
was clearing the pail. so didnt know supposed to get someone to teach them.
jiahuan went;D hahhaha but dazu damn sian.
break~ went to find the sec1s.
but then they all damn dumb leh.
third floor so many vacant classroom then still went fourth floor.
looked practically the whole upper sec block ah._.
found them slacking. lol get them to play skill for me~
not bad not bad for the first time;D seriously;D
then awhile must go back liaoT.T
learned two pages of pivates of the carribean.
the song damn nice but hard to playT.T
alot of beat and rhythem partT.T
ergao part was as usual weird. got yigaos to teach me.
lol they all can be ergao sl liao;D hahhaha
awhile later dismiss. but since not going dinner, we left awhile later too;DD

nxt week finally CNY~
hopes to post before i leave to malaysia;D

hahahah i know my post super short liao;D hhehhehe